2004-05-09 - 9:44 p.m.
"i'll draw a pretty picture/i'll draw it with a twist/i'll draw it with a cutting knife/i'll draw it on my wrist/and if i draw the picture right/a fountain will appear/to wash away my troubles/all my sorrow and my fears" -unknown
Interesting weekend. Long. Too long. Friend in town. Gunna get to see her, should be fun. Read some stuff that did a really good job of confusing me. You know how sometimes you think you are right about something.. you are so damn set on believeing you are right.. but then you find something out that makes you think you could be wrong? I hate being wrong. It's one of those things that nagg at me so much that I feel like throwing something against a wall just to hear the breaking sound. Like the way a glass bottle sounds as it crashes into the ground, shattering into a million unreplaceable peices. I hate being wrong so much, yet it happens all the time. It happens more often than I like to admit, and it pisses me off more so as well. I tend to have an attitude towards things that I keep unless there is something that can prove me so wrong that I have no choice but to act stupid (like i didn't know) or to admit to my defeat. Defeat is an evil thing as well. To give into something that you fight so hard against. To have to surrender your beliefs because one proven fact or one unchangeable thing shows you that you were wrong. It's a disgusting thing. It makes your mouth foam and you bite down on your tounge so hard it bleeds, but you don't mind because the taste of blood is welcomed in your mouth. Welcomed as if you fed on it, like a creature of the night.