2005-01-01 - 1:57 a.m.
Hmm.. What to say about today. I really like someone. Or maybe I only like the concept of liking somone.. No. I really doo. But I'm .. kinda almost not officially dating someone else.. LOL I so don't want to go into this.
My last entry was while I was in Juneau. It fucking sucked until the last two days. When I almost hooked up with a completely different someone. I feel like a whore all over again. If I weren't a virgin. I'd probably be a slut. That's why I'm glad I am.
Wow. Ok. It's early.. late is.. I dunno.. I know I was reading someone elses entry and almost fell asleep. And not cause her entry was boring. Cause It's early late. and that asshole hasn't called me. If he had. I would have said yes. I know I would have. SO perhaps It's better he didn't. I've talked myself into it. at two twenty one in the morning I'm feeling mighty fucking lonely.
It won't last long. A week maybe. . . maybe two. He'd hate being with me. I'd get jealous cause he's always with someone else or something, even if I don't really care. Something dumb and long and confusing would happen. And what about when adam get's back? Is it possible that he's only doin this to be an ass to his friend. Or "friend" To .. prove something or something. Or because he thinks he can get.. something. Grr.. I dunno It's back to that whole.. dramma . . . low self esteem thing. I know if I'm with either of them it won't be good for the way I feel about myself. One is perfect, and the other likes perfection. Yeaaah. I don't know what either of them see.
Uggghhh.. Droopy eyes. I can't seem to stay awake. Oh.. shit I was telling you about my trip. (Nice Tia. Forget about things in the middle of talking about them) Ok..Sooo it sucked until the last day when I really wanted to stay just for a little while longer. Of course.. now I'm back here .. in town.. In home.. and i'm glad I am.
Had a little fireworks party tonight. It was fun. Me grandma grandpa megn shadow and janet. It was one of the better. I hope my grandpa enjoyed it. I'm gunna miss him soo much.
Yuck. NOw i'm all death talky. not to mention i'm kinda just going off on random tangents. I guess shads and Janet finally hooked. Not hooked as in dated, just hooked at the lips.
GODDMANIT YOU MOTHER FUCKER! CALL ME!!
ahem. Sorry. LOL. Sorry sorry. oh wow. NOt tired anymore. Kinda want to go play ddr. I've been playing it a lot lately. I have to wears socks when I play though I dont' like that. Not because I don't like socks, just because i don't like how slippery the mats are when you wear..... oh.. OK yeah Now i'm doing it again. More random things.
*sigh* I give up. I'm going to try and think about.. one thing. Like.. oh I don't even know.
Heh I guess I didn't write abgout my going to work stoned before winter break did i? Heh, I got weed from chris and then shadow and i went and got sooo fucking stoned. Shadow fucking flipped out though. Started shaking and all this shit. I pretended that I had something in my eyes when I was helping customers so they had a reason to be red. It was soo fucking awesome though. I loooove being stoned. I fucking hate drama and debate for that exact reason. This summer is going to kick soo much asss!! For real this time.
Last summer sucked cause we were like "oh yeah we're gunna go get sooo fucking stoned all the time" but we could never find anybody. Now I know people. Might be dating one of them.