2005-02-23 - 11:28 a.m.
Oh god. I don't even know where to start right now. There is so much.. bullshit going on I dont even think i could write it all in one entry. LOL. I'd probably lose track of myself. I'll start with the good.
An old friend was remade. I didn't think i'd ever be able to talk to her again.. now . . we're at least on acceptalbe terms. Good.
Bad. A new friend is turning into a new asshole. No offense to him or anything.... I don't mean to insult, but you don't go behind peoples backs and tell other people they are mean and stupid and annoying and all that other shit and then act like a smiling idiot to their face. Laughing and talking like you never said anything bad. That's shit. FUCK. You.
Bad 2. Adam isn't doing any better. Yeah he's back in school and that's all fine and dandy, but he's still slacking off. Still shitting around like he's got nothing to worry about. No responsibility. It pisses me off so much. I wouldn't usually be so freaking upset, but the more he slacks the worse I feel. I want him to get everything in order and know what he's doing. Finishing school is important right now and he doesn't seem to realize that. I just. worry about him! Grr.!OH!! AND HE LIED TO ME!
Bad 3. My mother is still and evil whore.
Bad 4 (I didn't want to go into detail about the previous sorry) Chris is still being stupid. Even more stupid now if anything. He got kicked out of adams house for stealing beer. FUCKING BEER. what the hell? Grr.. I don't know wheter or not he did it.. He said he didn't and I want to believe him. I want to believe him with all i have but.. He's done it before. I've been on the phone with him when he's done it. Soo.. I don't know. I know he's got a lot of shit going on lately, with his grandpa and now with adams family, but .. that doesn't justify things.. ya know? There is so much I want to tell him, about how much I care, about how much I believe in him, about how much I want him to know that I"m here if he needs anything.. ever.. It's just hard sometimes. ACTUALLY. it's hard all the time. Everytime I try to talk to him I look at him and think .. this is so insignificant. It doesn't matter.
If it doesn't matter than why do I think about it all the time? Why is it all I can manage to think about when I have an extera minute? It's like he's taken over my brain.. seriously.. cause as soon as I go anywhere near him with what I've been thinking.. it's like whatever I was thinking was never there! He eats it! I swear! He eats my thoughts. THat's what I'm going to conclude with. Form now on I'm calling him thought eater T.E. Yep.. I shall dub him that this afternooon. Grr.. I have to go back to school now. Digital media class...
At least my humor put me into a better less worried mood.
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